Amma: Do you want me to fry up some mini-samosas for your friends?
Mädchen: No Mom. We don’t need to be that authentic.
Amma: What’s wrong with mini-samosas?!
Mädchen: My friends can’t handle the spice.
Begum: I told my daughter that henna was natural and harmless. But then my husband grabbed his iPhone and told me the FDA has not approved henna for skin applications. Some of these pastes contain toxic chemicals such as silver nitrate and chromium.
Admi: You mean to say that in this country it is perfectly legal for me to purchase a semi-automatic rifle but it is illegal to put henna on my hands?
Begmu: Yes. Try explaining that one to your European family members.
Amma: Ok, I’ve finished the henna for your one hand but I’m not going to do your other hand. Call me later and I can come down to your house and do the other hand.
Admi: Why not the other hand?
Amma: You have to drive home. And you have a history of smooshing your henna. You’re a Smoosher.
Amma: I love the silver boxes you brought for the girls. They are so cute! So blingy! And you filled them with candy.
Begum: Er, yes. About that candy. I actually re-gifted that. Sirin brought by a huge basket of Syrian treats, and there are way too many cookies and baklava, and these candies were in there and I just….
Amma: You did the right thing. You can’t eat all that stuff. It’s not healthy.
Begum: Er, yes. But you see, the candy is actually sugar-coated chole.
Amma: Garbanzo beans?!
Begum: Yes. And there is no way my sons are going to eat that. Not even during Ramadan.
Amma: The girls might be up for it. But I can see the Syrians doing that. I mean, if they do those Jordan almonds, they probably have this whole sugar-dipping thing figured out.
Begum: Yes! Like the Swiss with their fondue!
Amma: Sugar coated chick-peas. That is a first.